As a boy, when it came to bragging about their dad, I always had the trump card. My Dad was a whaler. He was born in the Azores Islands, which are a set of nine small islands in the Atlantic Ocean.
During his teenage years before he emigrated to the United States, my father served on whaling expeditions that would usually yield a couple gray whales a week. Growing up in poverty, the seas were the only place that could feed a family of nine. My grandfather surveyed the seas for signs of whales in a lighthouse on a hill. My father claimed that my grandfather really didn't do anything but use the binoculars to peep on women working in the fields below.
Hunting for whales might seem like an exotic adventure filled with danger, but it really wasn't. Only once in those four years did any problems arise and that was the story that piqued the interests of my friends:
One summer morning, my grandfather spotted the ocean spray of some gray whales in the distance and loudly rang the huge copper bell in the lighthouse. A motley crew of skinny young boys quickly assembled, running for their small, ramshackle houses near the docks. The long, thin boats were manned by nine men. On the high seas I always romanticized the idea that my Dad was the guy who stood over the whale menacingly holding the long, sharp harpoon and violently pierceing it into the whale's blubber and forcing the huge leviathan to moan in pain.
My Dad had the mundane job of holding the rope that was fastened to the harpoon. His duty was to make certain that the rope was wet or it would burn when the whale tried to flee.
On this day, the captain of the boat made of huge mistake. He wasn't well thought of by the crew because of his lack of attention to detail and a quick temper. The common procedure was for the whaling boat to pull up near the front of the whale. This was done because the pain of the harpoon would provoke a sharp reaction from the tail of the whale.
The whale was making it difficult for them to reach their desired target, so the captain instructed the harpoon man to stab the whale near the tail. He followed his commands and stuck the whale. The whale's montrous tail rose from the water and swatted the wooden boat into pieces. The whole crew was in the water for the next hour while another boat came to the rescue. They all knew what was going to happen next. The whale was bleeding and the blood naturally attracted sharks in the area.
One of the older crewmember named Manuel, first saw the ominous shark fins circling in the distance. Manuel was one of the few crewmembers who had a wife and family. He began sobbing, crying out their names.
"Maria! Jose!, Rui! Manuela!"
In the end, the sharks never came close to the wreckage and Manuel was reunited with his beloved family and my Dad was stocked with a whale of a story.
My Dad has always maintained a reverence for the majestic beasts that he once hunted. My Dad battled and slayed the monsters of the sea. What did yours do?
Thursday, February 17, 2005
Chabot College Also Changing School Name
Taking a cue from the newly-named Cal State-East Bay and the extreme apathy from Hayward residence that followed, Chabot College is also changing the institution's moniker. Here are a sample of the possible school names:
UCLA--University of Chabot, Lower Alameda; Hesperian High; Cha-Blew-it; C.I.T.--Chabot Institute of the Thoughtless and Cal State-My Parents Are Forcing Me To Be Here.
UCLA--University of Chabot, Lower Alameda; Hesperian High; Cha-Blew-it; C.I.T.--Chabot Institute of the Thoughtless and Cal State-My Parents Are Forcing Me To Be Here.
My iTunes Playlist (Feb. 17)
Here's a list of my recent iTunes downloads and what's playing in my CD player:
1 We're Not Gonna Take It-Twisted Sister
2 You Shook Me All Night Long-AC/DC
3 Highway to Hell-AC/DC
4 Hard to Handle-Black Crows
5 She Talks to Angels-Black Crows
6 Let Love Rule-Lenny Kravitz
7 Code of Silence-Bruce Springsteen
8 None but the Brave-Bruce Springsteen
9 Lift Me Up-Bruce Springsteen
10 Watching the Wheels-John Lennon
11 Give a Little Bit-Goo Goo Dolls
12 Float On-Modest Mouse
13 1985-Bowling for Soup
14 Have You Ever Loved a Woman-Bryan Adams
15 Let's Get Together-Al Green
16 Sittin' On (The Dock of the Bay)-Otis Redding
1 We're Not Gonna Take It-Twisted Sister
2 You Shook Me All Night Long-AC/DC
3 Highway to Hell-AC/DC
4 Hard to Handle-Black Crows
5 She Talks to Angels-Black Crows
6 Let Love Rule-Lenny Kravitz
7 Code of Silence-Bruce Springsteen
8 None but the Brave-Bruce Springsteen
9 Lift Me Up-Bruce Springsteen
10 Watching the Wheels-John Lennon
11 Give a Little Bit-Goo Goo Dolls
12 Float On-Modest Mouse
13 1985-Bowling for Soup
14 Have You Ever Loved a Woman-Bryan Adams
15 Let's Get Together-Al Green
16 Sittin' On (The Dock of the Bay)-Otis Redding
Monday, February 14, 2005
LaRussa Has The Most To Lose
Is it time to rethink the A’s glory days from 1988-1990? It is horrific to fathom that one of the greatest teams in the past 30 years and not to mention, one of my most cherished childhood memories--that of celebrating a World Championship in 1989, were tainted.
Jose Canseco has publicly accused his former Bash Brother, Mark McGwire of steroid use during an era where the A’s won three consecutive American League pennants and one World Series championship. These accomplishments are bogus.
The two most feared hitters in baseball at the time, arguably, did more to intimidate and win games than any other part of those teams. Might this have been a reason why so many other teams hated the A’s. What observers thought was jealous at their winning ways may have actually been contempt for their cheating ways.
The most interesting part of this burgeoning scandal is how high it will reach into the hierarchy of baseball. Canseco and McGwire were subordinates to manager, Tony LaRussa and general manager, Sandy Alderson.
LaRussa went on to manage the St. Louis Cardinals and has continued to add more to his resume that universally hails him as one of the most innovative and highly credible figures in baseball.
Alderson left the A’s to work as a vice president in the commissioners’ office.
LaRussa and Alderson lead us to believe they knew nothing of Canseco and McGwire’s cheating. LaRussa is quoted as saying that there were a few players on those A’s teams that he knew were using steroids. Is it fair to question LaRussa’s credibility in defending McGwire? Who were these players then? Dave Henderson? Felix Jose? Dave Parker? Parker was also involved in baseball’s others scandal, the cocaine problems of the early 80s.
In Alderson, we have a specific officer in baseball’s front office that is truly complicit in the steroid boom of the 1990s. Looking back now, what was Alderson’s real reason in the dubious trade of Canseco in 1992? It was very odd that a team that was leading their division and poised for the playoffs proceeded to trade one of their best players, thereby completely changing the makeup of a successful team with a month to go in the season. Did Alderson know something about Canseco then or did he think an equally volatile Ruben Sierra and two serviceable pitchers (Bobby Witt and Jeff Parrett) would put the A’s over the top?
Whether you watched the 1989 A’s with passing interest or popped champagne in celebration, other aspects of those teams need to be viewed differently, now.
The A’s pitching in those days were a haven for rejuvenating flagging careers or ones that never succeeded. Most notably it was because of one pitch--the split-finger fastball. Roger Craig, the future manager of the San Francisco Giants brought the pitch with him to the Giants from Detroit in 1986. The pitch that looked like a fastball but suddenly dipped just as it reached the plate revolutionized the game. After a few years, a backlash against the pitch grew. Some opposing players and managers openly speculated whether there was more to the pitch than splitting two fingers far apart. Successful split-finger pitchers like Jack Morris, Rick Reuschel, Don Robinson, Mike Scott and Dave Stewart were routinely accused of illegally scuffing the baseball for more movement.
Is it plausible to wonder whether the A’s pitchers were also cheating? Pitchers like Stewart, Gene Nelson, Rick Honeycutt, Mike Moore, Storm Davis, Scott Sanderson and Hall of Famer, Dennis Eckersley all came to the A’s during this period with careers like that never quite took off or were in serious decline. Did this controversial pitch constitute cheating or a very novel and fair approach by a good pitching coach and manager?
LaRussa, himself, posed the question yesterday when he wondered whether Canseco’s allegations would taint the exploits of those teams. Maybe the one with the most to lose in all of this is people like LaRussa. In the coming weeks and months, will we begin to shift the prevailing wisdom of LaRussa from the law-educated revolutionary manager to the meandering enabler who allowed winning come before unethical behavior under his watch.
Jose Canseco has publicly accused his former Bash Brother, Mark McGwire of steroid use during an era where the A’s won three consecutive American League pennants and one World Series championship. These accomplishments are bogus.
The two most feared hitters in baseball at the time, arguably, did more to intimidate and win games than any other part of those teams. Might this have been a reason why so many other teams hated the A’s. What observers thought was jealous at their winning ways may have actually been contempt for their cheating ways.
The most interesting part of this burgeoning scandal is how high it will reach into the hierarchy of baseball. Canseco and McGwire were subordinates to manager, Tony LaRussa and general manager, Sandy Alderson.
LaRussa went on to manage the St. Louis Cardinals and has continued to add more to his resume that universally hails him as one of the most innovative and highly credible figures in baseball.
Alderson left the A’s to work as a vice president in the commissioners’ office.
LaRussa and Alderson lead us to believe they knew nothing of Canseco and McGwire’s cheating. LaRussa is quoted as saying that there were a few players on those A’s teams that he knew were using steroids. Is it fair to question LaRussa’s credibility in defending McGwire? Who were these players then? Dave Henderson? Felix Jose? Dave Parker? Parker was also involved in baseball’s others scandal, the cocaine problems of the early 80s.
In Alderson, we have a specific officer in baseball’s front office that is truly complicit in the steroid boom of the 1990s. Looking back now, what was Alderson’s real reason in the dubious trade of Canseco in 1992? It was very odd that a team that was leading their division and poised for the playoffs proceeded to trade one of their best players, thereby completely changing the makeup of a successful team with a month to go in the season. Did Alderson know something about Canseco then or did he think an equally volatile Ruben Sierra and two serviceable pitchers (Bobby Witt and Jeff Parrett) would put the A’s over the top?
Whether you watched the 1989 A’s with passing interest or popped champagne in celebration, other aspects of those teams need to be viewed differently, now.
The A’s pitching in those days were a haven for rejuvenating flagging careers or ones that never succeeded. Most notably it was because of one pitch--the split-finger fastball. Roger Craig, the future manager of the San Francisco Giants brought the pitch with him to the Giants from Detroit in 1986. The pitch that looked like a fastball but suddenly dipped just as it reached the plate revolutionized the game. After a few years, a backlash against the pitch grew. Some opposing players and managers openly speculated whether there was more to the pitch than splitting two fingers far apart. Successful split-finger pitchers like Jack Morris, Rick Reuschel, Don Robinson, Mike Scott and Dave Stewart were routinely accused of illegally scuffing the baseball for more movement.
Is it plausible to wonder whether the A’s pitchers were also cheating? Pitchers like Stewart, Gene Nelson, Rick Honeycutt, Mike Moore, Storm Davis, Scott Sanderson and Hall of Famer, Dennis Eckersley all came to the A’s during this period with careers like that never quite took off or were in serious decline. Did this controversial pitch constitute cheating or a very novel and fair approach by a good pitching coach and manager?
LaRussa, himself, posed the question yesterday when he wondered whether Canseco’s allegations would taint the exploits of those teams. Maybe the one with the most to lose in all of this is people like LaRussa. In the coming weeks and months, will we begin to shift the prevailing wisdom of LaRussa from the law-educated revolutionary manager to the meandering enabler who allowed winning come before unethical behavior under his watch.
Saturday, February 12, 2005
Apologists Be Damned
Do you get the feeling Major League Baseball has done more than moved a franchise to Washington, D.C., but also learned the simple Beltway strategy of smearing opponents.
Since bits of Jose Canseco's book implicating some current Major Leaguers of steroids use were reported by the New York Daily News, MLB apologists have repeatedly popped up.
Apologists like Tony LaRussa, Walt Weiss and, of course, Bud Selig have a had one common refrain: attack the truth and credibility of Canseco. He feels he's been blackballed by baseball therefore he has an ax to grind. He needs to money. He's jealous of Mark McGwire's success. Or as Jason Giambi said yesterday, "He's delusional".
In fact, Giambi was certifiably delusional at a press conference yesterday where he apologized five times but never answered what he was actually apologizing for.
All these statements about Canseco have a grain of plausibility, but the facts have clearly been laid out. Major Leaguers have been using steroids and grand jury testimony shows that the biggest stars in the game have admitted to them. Barry Bonds, Giambi, Gary Sheffield, Canseco and the recently deceased 1996 National League MVP, Ken Caminiti are guilty.
When is Major League Baseball, which is also complicit in this epidemic, going to come clean. The damage has been done to the game and its hallowed records, but cannot be quantified in the physical damage done to the athlete's bodies.
Some believe Giambi's pituitary gland cancer was accelerated by steroid use. Caminiti is dead. Who can guess which Major Leaguers will slowly waste away from steroid use in the same manner as the former Raider, Lyle Alzado.
Sadly, in addition to wondering who will win the World Series, this spring will bring with it whispers of who looks skinnier and who looks less bulky. Let's cut with hiding what everybody already knows: after all these years, the baseballs weren't juiced, the players were.
Since bits of Jose Canseco's book implicating some current Major Leaguers of steroids use were reported by the New York Daily News, MLB apologists have repeatedly popped up.
Apologists like Tony LaRussa, Walt Weiss and, of course, Bud Selig have a had one common refrain: attack the truth and credibility of Canseco. He feels he's been blackballed by baseball therefore he has an ax to grind. He needs to money. He's jealous of Mark McGwire's success. Or as Jason Giambi said yesterday, "He's delusional".
In fact, Giambi was certifiably delusional at a press conference yesterday where he apologized five times but never answered what he was actually apologizing for.
All these statements about Canseco have a grain of plausibility, but the facts have clearly been laid out. Major Leaguers have been using steroids and grand jury testimony shows that the biggest stars in the game have admitted to them. Barry Bonds, Giambi, Gary Sheffield, Canseco and the recently deceased 1996 National League MVP, Ken Caminiti are guilty.
When is Major League Baseball, which is also complicit in this epidemic, going to come clean. The damage has been done to the game and its hallowed records, but cannot be quantified in the physical damage done to the athlete's bodies.
Some believe Giambi's pituitary gland cancer was accelerated by steroid use. Caminiti is dead. Who can guess which Major Leaguers will slowly waste away from steroid use in the same manner as the former Raider, Lyle Alzado.
Sadly, in addition to wondering who will win the World Series, this spring will bring with it whispers of who looks skinnier and who looks less bulky. Let's cut with hiding what everybody already knows: after all these years, the baseballs weren't juiced, the players were.
Friday, February 11, 2005
Lupus Walk/Run Set For May 22
The 11th Annual 5K Walk and Run for Lupus is set for Sunday, May 22nd beginning at 8am at West Valley College in Saratoga.
Be there with your walking shoes for Suzao! Entry fee is $20 before May 10th and $25 after.
Visti www.balf.org for more information.
Be there with your walking shoes for Suzao! Entry fee is $20 before May 10th and $25 after.
Visti www.balf.org for more information.
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
Palmeiro Issues Statement Denying Steroids
In Jose Canseco's soon-to-be-released tell all book titled, "Juiced: Wild Times, Rampant 'Roids, Smash Hits, and How Baseball Got Big," he implicates several big leaguers including Mark Mc Gwire, Juan Gonzalez, Ivan Rodriguez and Viagra pitchman Rafael Palmeiro.
Said Palmeiro: "I categorically deny any suggestions that I have ever used a performance-enhancing drugs other than weiner pills."
(Any suggestion in the accompanied photo that Palmeiro is applying some his weiner enhancing techniques on Canseco is purely speculative)
Said Palmeiro: "I categorically deny any suggestions that I have ever used a performance-enhancing drugs other than weiner pills."
(Any suggestion in the accompanied photo that Palmeiro is applying some his weiner enhancing techniques on Canseco is purely speculative)
Saturday, February 05, 2005
Champions Again; Pats to rout Eagles, 38-24
On Sunday, the Patriots will embark on punctuating a four year dynasty rarely seen in the NFL by winning their third championship in four years.
Many forget that this run by the Pats began inauspicously. It's rarely mentioned anymore that New England's victory over the Rams in 2001 was one of the biggest upsets in Super Bowl history. The Pats were 14 points underdogs to the high-flying Rams.
Last year, the Pats again squeeked by the Panthers on kicker, Adam Vinatieri's second game-winning field goal. Believe it, these Patriots are one of the finest teams ever assembled in NFL history and for this reason they will rout the Philadelphia Eagles in Jacksonville to make history sure of their dominance.
It's hard to prognosticate Super Bowl's because they are so superficially hyped and account for so much more emotion than any other games. It is wholly believable that the Eagles have fallen victim to the adage of "just happy to be there". They seemed way to ecstatic to have the NFC Championship monkey off their back. New England, on the other hand, showed their remarkable poise that is very reminiscent of the BIll Walsh-Joe Montana Super Bowl years in San Francisco.
It is foolish to debate the similarities of Tom Brady to Joe Montana but the similarities in sheer confidence and dominance of these Patriots' teams under Bill Belichick and Walsh's 49er teams are eery.
In general, both teams rarely made mistakes, at least, costly ones. Both jump on their opponents neck and never relent, Both have quiet, universally lauded head coaches who seemingly adapt to any situation. And both teams make forming predictions very simple.
It will go down like this on Sunday. Much like New England's playoff victories over the Colts and Steelers, it will be the underrated and injured secondary of the Pats that will be the catalyst to victory.
Corey Dillon may loom large in New Engand's offensive approach. He just may be Tom Brady's biggest obstacle to three Super Bowl MVPs.
After a very competitive three quarters, the Patroits will pull away and win their third Super Bowl trophy, 38-24.
Many forget that this run by the Pats began inauspicously. It's rarely mentioned anymore that New England's victory over the Rams in 2001 was one of the biggest upsets in Super Bowl history. The Pats were 14 points underdogs to the high-flying Rams.
Last year, the Pats again squeeked by the Panthers on kicker, Adam Vinatieri's second game-winning field goal. Believe it, these Patriots are one of the finest teams ever assembled in NFL history and for this reason they will rout the Philadelphia Eagles in Jacksonville to make history sure of their dominance.
It's hard to prognosticate Super Bowl's because they are so superficially hyped and account for so much more emotion than any other games. It is wholly believable that the Eagles have fallen victim to the adage of "just happy to be there". They seemed way to ecstatic to have the NFC Championship monkey off their back. New England, on the other hand, showed their remarkable poise that is very reminiscent of the BIll Walsh-Joe Montana Super Bowl years in San Francisco.
It is foolish to debate the similarities of Tom Brady to Joe Montana but the similarities in sheer confidence and dominance of these Patriots' teams under Bill Belichick and Walsh's 49er teams are eery.
In general, both teams rarely made mistakes, at least, costly ones. Both jump on their opponents neck and never relent, Both have quiet, universally lauded head coaches who seemingly adapt to any situation. And both teams make forming predictions very simple.
It will go down like this on Sunday. Much like New England's playoff victories over the Colts and Steelers, it will be the underrated and injured secondary of the Pats that will be the catalyst to victory.
Corey Dillon may loom large in New Engand's offensive approach. He just may be Tom Brady's biggest obstacle to three Super Bowl MVPs.
After a very competitive three quarters, the Patroits will pull away and win their third Super Bowl trophy, 38-24.
Friday, February 04, 2005
Perception Is An Amazing Thing
An astute observation was made by the New York Times' Sports Media columnist, Richard Sandomir regarding Sunday's Super Bowl halftime show.
"Paul McCartney, in a peach-colored sweater and faded jeans, sat in a ballroom full of cameras and reporters Thursday, playing a new role 41 years after the Beatles stormed America: the restorer of Super Bowl decency and family values. So many years ago, the moptops from Liverpool were viewed as sinful corrupters of our youth."
Perception is a funny thing, isn't it?
Those same rabble-rousing English boys are now regarding as some of the greatest musicians of the 20th century. Makes you wonder how this generation's crop of bad boy recording artists' will be view in the same way. The early 80s rap trio of Run DMC is already lauded as godfathers of rap albeit with broad strokes.
Going back to the 1920s, Jazz was relegated to closed doors and alley ways. The name "jazz" even had a profanely sexual connatation. What is Jazz today other than a dying artform? Along with the Declaration of Independence, baseball and apple pie; a uniquely American creation.
Can you imagine the day when old men routinely chat about the those "old" rappers. C'mon on Billy, turn that music off and listen to some Snoop Dogg? Naw, Grandpa, that's old people's music.
"Paul McCartney, in a peach-colored sweater and faded jeans, sat in a ballroom full of cameras and reporters Thursday, playing a new role 41 years after the Beatles stormed America: the restorer of Super Bowl decency and family values. So many years ago, the moptops from Liverpool were viewed as sinful corrupters of our youth."
Perception is a funny thing, isn't it?
Those same rabble-rousing English boys are now regarding as some of the greatest musicians of the 20th century. Makes you wonder how this generation's crop of bad boy recording artists' will be view in the same way. The early 80s rap trio of Run DMC is already lauded as godfathers of rap albeit with broad strokes.
Going back to the 1920s, Jazz was relegated to closed doors and alley ways. The name "jazz" even had a profanely sexual connatation. What is Jazz today other than a dying artform? Along with the Declaration of Independence, baseball and apple pie; a uniquely American creation.
Can you imagine the day when old men routinely chat about the those "old" rappers. C'mon on Billy, turn that music off and listen to some Snoop Dogg? Naw, Grandpa, that's old people's music.
Tuesday, February 01, 2005
Would The NFL Cancel The Super Bowl If...?
What if Pope John Paul II passes away this weekend? Would the NFL possibly postpone the Super Bowl in deference to the pontiff?
It would be hard to imagine the NFL commissioner, Paul Tagliabue staging the Super Bowl a week later even if the attention of the world is on Rome rather than Jacksonville. There are precendents for this sort of crossover of news and sports.
In 1963, the late commish of the NFL, Pete Rozelle, famously went forward with the week's games after the death of President John F. Kennedy. Conversely, Major League Baseball and the NFL both cancelled games after 9/11.
It would be hard to imagine the NFL commissioner, Paul Tagliabue staging the Super Bowl a week later even if the attention of the world is on Rome rather than Jacksonville. There are precendents for this sort of crossover of news and sports.
In 1963, the late commish of the NFL, Pete Rozelle, famously went forward with the week's games after the death of President John F. Kennedy. Conversely, Major League Baseball and the NFL both cancelled games after 9/11.
Monday, January 31, 2005
Confessions Of A Mini-Taco Lover
Dear ConAgra Foods:
First off, I must tell you that I thoroughly enjoy your Mini-Tacos. I devour them with the ferocity of a condemned man on execution night. In fact, if I were due to be murdered by the state I would proudly have the Mini-Taco bile mixture of tortillas and beef in my intestines. Again, I love your delicious delights of Mexican fare. One of the worst days of my life occurred September 11, 2001. That's right. My local Albertson's sold out your scrumptious Mexican morsels.
But, I have some suggestions for your luscious Latin American treats...Make them bigger!
Hey, I admire them as much as the next bandito but Mini-Tacos are very time intensive. Is it just me, but is it hard to so finely dice tomatoes and lettuce? Maybe you can create a promotion for really small cheese shredders. Who has time to dollop tiny dots of sour cream on each mini-taco? I use an eye dropper.
I noticed on your box that they're are made in Ohio. Is there a large Spanish-speaking midget population near Cleveland? How do they ply their dainty digits so well and send such love to my tum-tum?
Mini-Tacos may not be the most perfect food, but they make me feel good. They make me feel bigger than myself. It's good for the ol' confidence, you know. Holding those beautiful bites of beef in my hand make me feel larger than life. I can hold like 20 tacos in my hands. Who, but a giant, could perform such feats?
Epicurious,
Steve Tavares
PS: Could you tell me if it's necessary to store mini-tacos in mini-refrigerators?
First off, I must tell you that I thoroughly enjoy your Mini-Tacos. I devour them with the ferocity of a condemned man on execution night. In fact, if I were due to be murdered by the state I would proudly have the Mini-Taco bile mixture of tortillas and beef in my intestines. Again, I love your delicious delights of Mexican fare. One of the worst days of my life occurred September 11, 2001. That's right. My local Albertson's sold out your scrumptious Mexican morsels.
But, I have some suggestions for your luscious Latin American treats...Make them bigger!
Hey, I admire them as much as the next bandito but Mini-Tacos are very time intensive. Is it just me, but is it hard to so finely dice tomatoes and lettuce? Maybe you can create a promotion for really small cheese shredders. Who has time to dollop tiny dots of sour cream on each mini-taco? I use an eye dropper.
I noticed on your box that they're are made in Ohio. Is there a large Spanish-speaking midget population near Cleveland? How do they ply their dainty digits so well and send such love to my tum-tum?
Mini-Tacos may not be the most perfect food, but they make me feel good. They make me feel bigger than myself. It's good for the ol' confidence, you know. Holding those beautiful bites of beef in my hand make me feel larger than life. I can hold like 20 tacos in my hands. Who, but a giant, could perform such feats?
Epicurious,
Steve Tavares
PS: Could you tell me if it's necessary to store mini-tacos in mini-refrigerators?
Sunday, January 30, 2005
LFR Endores Kerry in Iraqi Elections
We are told that this is a "historic" day in Iraq. The first free elections in a generation. Apparently, before the price of elections were two goats, your hands, semi-naked pictures of Phyllis Diller, a six-pack of Tab and Anne Murray's Greatest Hits.
Surprisingly, John Kerry's name is one of the 8,000 names on the ballot. It's not clear whether this is actually the senator from Massuchusetts, but an Iraqi group named "Camel Riding Veterans for the Truth" have charged Kerry with faking wounds inflicted by the Babylonians during the war in Mesopotamia.
In the days leading to elections in Iraq there were worries that the Sunni minority would boycott the vote. In a turn of events that have baffled election officials, reports are trickling in that African-Americans are being denied access to polling places in Southern Iraq. Said Loretta Jackson of Tuscaloosa, Alabama: "Oh, no, this shit ain't happening to me again!"
There's is no evidence of any link to the six (Update: by the end of the day there were nine)suicide bombings that have occured in Baghdad today, but it does show how far Iraqis have to go until they become a true democracy.
According to the Iraqi bureau of the Nielsen TV ratings firm, Iraqis just don't get it. Far less Iraqis are expecting to vote in the upcoming finals of the hit singing competition, Iraqi Idol, than in today's vote.
The president of Nielsen, Bill Johnson said, "Until Iraqis feel comfortable enough with national elections that they can pay more attention to a big, fat guy and an androgynous human being only then will they be swindled properly by their leaders."
Other Iraqi Elections thoughts: How far has war profiteering gone in Iraq. It seems that even Tupperware has a stake in the war. Have you notice the big plastic ballot boxes on television? Come on! How are those things sealed? When you hear the burp you know you can proceed with rigging the vote.
Surprisingly, John Kerry's name is one of the 8,000 names on the ballot. It's not clear whether this is actually the senator from Massuchusetts, but an Iraqi group named "Camel Riding Veterans for the Truth" have charged Kerry with faking wounds inflicted by the Babylonians during the war in Mesopotamia.
In the days leading to elections in Iraq there were worries that the Sunni minority would boycott the vote. In a turn of events that have baffled election officials, reports are trickling in that African-Americans are being denied access to polling places in Southern Iraq. Said Loretta Jackson of Tuscaloosa, Alabama: "Oh, no, this shit ain't happening to me again!"
There's is no evidence of any link to the six (Update: by the end of the day there were nine)suicide bombings that have occured in Baghdad today, but it does show how far Iraqis have to go until they become a true democracy.
According to the Iraqi bureau of the Nielsen TV ratings firm, Iraqis just don't get it. Far less Iraqis are expecting to vote in the upcoming finals of the hit singing competition, Iraqi Idol, than in today's vote.
The president of Nielsen, Bill Johnson said, "Until Iraqis feel comfortable enough with national elections that they can pay more attention to a big, fat guy and an androgynous human being only then will they be swindled properly by their leaders."
Other Iraqi Elections thoughts: How far has war profiteering gone in Iraq. It seems that even Tupperware has a stake in the war. Have you notice the big plastic ballot boxes on television? Come on! How are those things sealed? When you hear the burp you know you can proceed with rigging the vote.
Monday, January 24, 2005
F@#% Michigan!
Obviously little Johnny was very unhappy with Ohio State's 60-56 overtime loss against Minnesota last Saturday night. The Buckeyes fell to 1-4 in Big Ten play.
The Golden Gophers scored nine straight points late in the game to force overtime.
Little Johnny had this to say: "F##$% those mutha#$%$, sons of b#$%$$. I would like to stick my little #@$$ up their golden #$%#. I hate those guys and I hate you too, Mom!"
The Golden Gophers scored nine straight points late in the game to force overtime.
Little Johnny had this to say: "F##$% those mutha#$%$, sons of b#$%$$. I would like to stick my little #@$$ up their golden #$%#. I hate those guys and I hate you too, Mom!"
Sunday, January 23, 2005
Theeeeeere Goes Johnny!
Carnac: Ben Gay.
Ed McMahon: Ben Gay.
Carnac: Is there an echo?
Ed: Ha Ha Yes!
Carnac: Ben Gay
Carnac: Why didn't Mrs. Franklin have any kids?
Hey Yo!!!
The "King of Late Night" passed away today at the age of 79.
For me, around the age of eight or nine, staying up long enough to watch the Tonight Show was a grand achievement. Usually by the time I had reached these uncharted waters I quickly fell asleep. In the coming years I would learn more about comedy, most notably delivery and timing, and also witnessed the innate warmth that radiated through him every weekday night.
I was fascinated by the dichotomy that was Carson's personality. How could a man so much in the limelight be so shy?
In 1992, just after he left the Tonight Show, I took a tour of the NBC studios in Burbank. The tour guide escorted us to the since barren set that so many late night memories were staged. We were told that Carson was obsessively shy. In fact, the studio's ceiling was purposely built low and the combination of the bright lights and low roof formed an artificial barrier for Carson to feel comfortable.
I can never forget being the first person at my house to notice that Johnny's zipper was open during his monologue sometime in the 80s. His ability to constantly needle his own foibles and jokingly picking fun of sidekick Ed McMahon's proclivity towards a few cocktails made the audience feel like they were on the inside of so many jokes.
When I was young, I always dreamed of being on the Tonight Show with Johnny. Maybe guest hosting or performing my comedy routine. A comic always knew were truly successful when they heard Carson's trademark cackle rise to the top of the entire audiences roar.
Here's to the man who tucked so many Americans in the bed with laughter and entertainment for over 30 years. Thank you, Johnny.
Ed McMahon: Ben Gay.
Carnac: Is there an echo?
Ed: Ha Ha Yes!
Carnac: Ben Gay
Carnac: Why didn't Mrs. Franklin have any kids?
Hey Yo!!!
The "King of Late Night" passed away today at the age of 79.
For me, around the age of eight or nine, staying up long enough to watch the Tonight Show was a grand achievement. Usually by the time I had reached these uncharted waters I quickly fell asleep. In the coming years I would learn more about comedy, most notably delivery and timing, and also witnessed the innate warmth that radiated through him every weekday night.
I was fascinated by the dichotomy that was Carson's personality. How could a man so much in the limelight be so shy?
In 1992, just after he left the Tonight Show, I took a tour of the NBC studios in Burbank. The tour guide escorted us to the since barren set that so many late night memories were staged. We were told that Carson was obsessively shy. In fact, the studio's ceiling was purposely built low and the combination of the bright lights and low roof formed an artificial barrier for Carson to feel comfortable.
I can never forget being the first person at my house to notice that Johnny's zipper was open during his monologue sometime in the 80s. His ability to constantly needle his own foibles and jokingly picking fun of sidekick Ed McMahon's proclivity towards a few cocktails made the audience feel like they were on the inside of so many jokes.
When I was young, I always dreamed of being on the Tonight Show with Johnny. Maybe guest hosting or performing my comedy routine. A comic always knew were truly successful when they heard Carson's trademark cackle rise to the top of the entire audiences roar.
Here's to the man who tucked so many Americans in the bed with laughter and entertainment for over 30 years. Thank you, Johnny.
Saturday, January 22, 2005
Falcons Will Win; I Should Have Played Lotto
"The best way I can describe Michael Vick would be to call him a robot; a cyber QB. In my lifetime I've never seen an athlete like #7. I believe he could literally win the Super Bowl for Hotlanta by himself. Imagine when more pieces are put in place. This is the NFC representative in Super Bowl XXXIX."
"Same old story in Cheesesteak land. Home field advantage in the NFC and another loss in the championship game. In the end, you'll find that Philly isn't much better or worse in whole scheme of things with Terrell Owens."
Those two statement were written in the LFR on September 12, 2004.
I also picked the Eagles to win the East and secure the home-field advantage in the playoffs and Atlanta to win the South.
How will the Eagles, ranked 19th against the run, stop the three-headed falcon of Michael Vick, Warrick Dunn and T.J. Duckett?
A foot of snow is expected in Philly for Sunday's game. The rule of thumb in football is that a run-oriented offense will thrive in stormy conditions. The Falcons won't rush for 327 yards like they did against St. Louis, but expect a healthy dose and a few short yardage touchdowns from Duckett.
Atlanta will head to Jacksonville with the most exciting player in the NFL and a defense that is as formidable as any the Patroits or Steelers have faced all season.
Do you think the 49ers are regretting letting the next Jon Gruden, in Jim Mora, Jr., fall through their grasp?
"Same old story in Cheesesteak land. Home field advantage in the NFC and another loss in the championship game. In the end, you'll find that Philly isn't much better or worse in whole scheme of things with Terrell Owens."
Those two statement were written in the LFR on September 12, 2004.
I also picked the Eagles to win the East and secure the home-field advantage in the playoffs and Atlanta to win the South.
How will the Eagles, ranked 19th against the run, stop the three-headed falcon of Michael Vick, Warrick Dunn and T.J. Duckett?
A foot of snow is expected in Philly for Sunday's game. The rule of thumb in football is that a run-oriented offense will thrive in stormy conditions. The Falcons won't rush for 327 yards like they did against St. Louis, but expect a healthy dose and a few short yardage touchdowns from Duckett.
Atlanta will head to Jacksonville with the most exciting player in the NFL and a defense that is as formidable as any the Patroits or Steelers have faced all season.
Do you think the 49ers are regretting letting the next Jon Gruden, in Jim Mora, Jr., fall through their grasp?
Pats Will Win Thanks To 'Big Ben'
I was a little off the mark with the AFC, though. Corey Dillon actually ran for the most yards in Patriots history and their nose tackle did just fine. I also picked the Pats second in the East with a wildcard. I picked Pittsburgh, on the other hand, fourth in the North, but wait! I did say Ben Rothlisberger would be good. C'mon.
Here's what I wrote in the LFR on September 12, 2004:
"I don't buy into the whole Patriots dynasty talk. RB Corey Dillon will turn out to be a dubious addition to a team that values cohesion. With DL Ted Washington gone to the Raidahs, how will they stop the run? Many football people are raving about rookie NT Vince Wilfork, like Vilma a product of Miami (FL). I think it's hard to count on a rookie to play nose tackle on a contending team. Aside from that, they have head coach, BIll Belichick and QB Tom Brady. There will be no Super Bowl letdown for the Pats."
"At first glance, the Steelers seem solid. QB Tommy Maddox should hold the starting spot nicely until Ben Rothlisberger is ready (he's going to be gooood). Pittsburgh is trying to do the retro thing on defense. Former defensive coordinator, Dick LeBeau, is back, but he doesn't have the same personnel. The defense will be like fitting square pegs into a round hole. On offense, RB Duce Staley will do fine until about Week 7, then, I don't know how RB Jerome Bettis can still perform to his former level."
This game is wonderfully matched. On one hand, how can you go against the defending Super Bowl Champs. On the other, how can you go against a team that's won 15 straight games?
The intriguing question is how can a quarterback that has won his first 14 games possibly be viewed as shaky? This game will come down to the Steelers' QB Rothlisberger. Is his thumb bothering him? Maybe. More likely, the pressure is bothering him. If the Jets can put so much fear in his game, can you imagine the seasoned Patroits defense feasting on young Ben.
This game will not be easy for New England. Pittsburgh will still grind the ball on the ground with Jerome Bettis and eat up a majority of the clock. The difference will be multiple interceptions from the rookie QB and possible TD returns coupled with the sure-footed kicker, Adam Vinatieri.
New England will try for their third title in four years on Feb. 6th.
Here's what I wrote in the LFR on September 12, 2004:
"I don't buy into the whole Patriots dynasty talk. RB Corey Dillon will turn out to be a dubious addition to a team that values cohesion. With DL Ted Washington gone to the Raidahs, how will they stop the run? Many football people are raving about rookie NT Vince Wilfork, like Vilma a product of Miami (FL). I think it's hard to count on a rookie to play nose tackle on a contending team. Aside from that, they have head coach, BIll Belichick and QB Tom Brady. There will be no Super Bowl letdown for the Pats."
"At first glance, the Steelers seem solid. QB Tommy Maddox should hold the starting spot nicely until Ben Rothlisberger is ready (he's going to be gooood). Pittsburgh is trying to do the retro thing on defense. Former defensive coordinator, Dick LeBeau, is back, but he doesn't have the same personnel. The defense will be like fitting square pegs into a round hole. On offense, RB Duce Staley will do fine until about Week 7, then, I don't know how RB Jerome Bettis can still perform to his former level."
This game is wonderfully matched. On one hand, how can you go against the defending Super Bowl Champs. On the other, how can you go against a team that's won 15 straight games?
The intriguing question is how can a quarterback that has won his first 14 games possibly be viewed as shaky? This game will come down to the Steelers' QB Rothlisberger. Is his thumb bothering him? Maybe. More likely, the pressure is bothering him. If the Jets can put so much fear in his game, can you imagine the seasoned Patroits defense feasting on young Ben.
This game will not be easy for New England. Pittsburgh will still grind the ball on the ground with Jerome Bettis and eat up a majority of the clock. The difference will be multiple interceptions from the rookie QB and possible TD returns coupled with the sure-footed kicker, Adam Vinatieri.
New England will try for their third title in four years on Feb. 6th.
Monday, January 17, 2005
The Boss Stole My Work
This is not some disgruntled screed against my former employer, but hopefully be read as constructive criticism and controlled angst towards the business world. Call it an epiphany into who I am and who I want to become.
Amidst corporate doublespeak I’ve struggled with a crisis of conscience. Can I survive and succeed in the rough and tumble business world of (empty) suits? Do I even want to?
It started with the simple public schmoozing of a newly hired supervisor to a company executive. Maybe you had to be there. Maybe the fact that this executive was blowing smoke up our ass to which nobody dared to respond. It was out of this atmosphere that the newbie chose to so finely illustrate the new company; the back-stabbing, ass-kissing, selfish prick.
This seemingly harmless and obscure scene has stay with me since. So much so, that I sat down with my manager and discussed, off the record, my coworkers’ banter with the executive. I remember saying, “Do I need to kiss ass to get ahead in the real world? Is it wise to expect that a boss in my future will respond to my honest and frank speak?”
From Day One, we have been fed a continuous stream of lies. First, that we all had a job at the new company on the condition that we worked harder. What we have since found is that our buyers strive to create cookie cutter banks--that is--place the same formula over every institution that is sucked into its orbit. We also found from other companies acquired by our buyers have an alarmingly high turnover rate. How does that happen? For one, the oldest trick in politics; frame the question before your opponent does and then answer it for them negatively.
They tell us to work harder and strive to achieve higher goals all the while, the create a false stigma that the employees are old, unmotivated, uneducated, lazy, complacent and surf the internet all day. The stereotype is pervasive and is the reason why no current employee of the “old regime” will ever seriously have any chance at all of the supposed great opportunities the bank has to offer.
In hiring, there is a concerted effort to offer positions only to college graduates whether or not they have any real experience on the job. As my manager postulates, the former owners chose to hire from within to save money subsequently left the company with a deficit of education within its ranks
Never mind that the former owners were a thrifty bunch, but they also faithfully treated their employees with respect. The treachery towards some of the executives from the old company is appalling.
When the former owners signed their checks they described them longingly as an anachronism in the fast-paced world of banking. Like a old, quaint building still standing amongst much larger and sleek skyscrapers. When they left, the company line was to tarnish everything that was created. Why didn’t they grow this bank? To listen some executives nowadays you would think that the former owners left the bank vault open and the keys under the mat.
When I came on board in 2000, I was skeptical about the former owners. Were they really so down-to-earth? Here was this scruffy guy in a faded leather bomber jacket eating miniature powder donuts in the lunchroom. He was truly the accidental banker. It wasn’t until his farewell dinner did I come to understand him and why the bank operated in such an old-style business manner.
He sat at the head table and completely fawned over his daughter who was sitting next to him. To this day, I have rarely seen so much apparent love for their offspring than I witnessed that night.
It is for this reason and solely this, that I react so angrily to the new description of my fellow coworkers. The executive from down south that I earlier mentioned dares to wonder, out loud, how we could never want to advance in our jobs and strive to achieve greater success and responsibility. He says, “Doesn’t it make you feel good to do a good job?” My response: I do not believe that this executive has any children of his own and if he does he should spend a little more time with them. What he reads as complacency other see as an honorable choice to allow stability to child rearing.
Employees didn’t go home to their children stressed out. Quitting time was 4:15, which allowed plenty of time to pickup their children from daycare. The people that I work with are hardworking, honorable people who have simply made the choice to give more of themselves to their families than to spreadsheets and mortgage loans. Instead of trashing our lifestyles, look at your own hollow existence.
It was in this atmosphere that I took it upon myself to ask for more work. I specifically requested an expansion of my duties on six occasion starting last May. I was given small, sometimes dubious work and completed it quickly and wallowed until I ask for more. My intention was merely to keep my mind active and not solely to gain notoriety, although, I expected it to come hand in hand.
Last month, I was given an assignment along with another person to create from existing sources a specific company procedure. I was given this assignment directly from my manager’s boss.
Once a draft of the procedure was created, it was effectively stolen from me by my boss. He conjured up a “corrected” copy of my draft in the form of a Word file. Instead of correcting the errors, he sought to visually inflate the number of errors by using the strikethrough function along with the correction in red. This apparent show of work on his part was undermined by the fact that nearly all of them came from existing procedures that surely was copy edited by our affiliated company down south.
Afterwards, I was completely shutout of any meeting pertaining to this project, in fact, my newly-hired supervisor, less than a week on the job, was jettisoned to one of these meetings instead of me. I obtained a copy of my manager’s creation and found it nearly identical to my draft.
When I confronted him on any of these facts he sheepishly ran from me without any answers to my queries. Why would he knowingly steal my work for his own? Many have told me that this happens all the time, “That’s what bosses do.” True, but in this instance, the assignment was given directly to me and my coworker not to him and no credit was due to him.
This is a selfish, conniving and morally bankrupt person. With the presupposition that to survive at this new bank, we needed to work harder; this manager has sought to undercut my ability to succeed for his own hide. He would rather reach his much sought after retirement age on the backs of people barely surviving on wages over the poverty line than by his own merits.
My disdain for his business acumen is pervasive throughout the company. Although, an acknowledgment of some sort of guile on his part should be recognized. His complete lack of any banking knowledge or leadership has defied logic for a long time. He cannot competently perform the duties of any of his subordinates. Has squandered three opportunities to learn the companies computer system in three years. He once famously mentioning that he didn’t need to learn it.
He pays lip-service to customer service when in fact speaking to a customer amounts to the pulling of one’s teeth. He shows very little empathy towards his employees to the point where he has made comments amounting to dismay that someone would need so many days to grieve or go so far as to rush an employee off the phone when she simply called him with an update of the status of her ailing spouse.
He also displays a shocking inability to make the simplest decisions. One notorious story included asking the former CFO how to solve an argument over a new leather jacket that was supposedly commingling with another's jacket in a closet. He favors leaning on his more knowledgeable employees to such a degree that they readily feel burned out or leave the company all together.
I apologize for this analogy, but he fits the basic plot of the children’s cartoon, “Inspector Gadget”. The bumbling, robotic super agent despite his buffoonery, always solves the crime not by his own good work but unknowingly by his young niece and her dog. My manager is Inspector Gadget and his underlings are the niece and dog. His boss can cite his ability to keep delinquencies low during staff meetings, but it clearly incites animosity and anger to the highest level. It further creates a divide between the higher ups and the regular employees.
When will executives at this company realize that the teamwork that they urge and describe to their workers comes across as deeply hollow. This type of camaraderie will only occur if the workers truly trust their bosses. When they have that sense; only then will this type of teamwork begin to coalesce. I attended a staff meeting two weeks ago where the same stock rhetoric of teamwork was pushed again. If this was a football team’s locker room an outside observer would surely conclude that the coach had lost the hearts and minds of the team. There was disinterest, anger and virtual daggers being shot towards her. Might this hostile attitude be warranted? Of course.
They hear an executive continually tell them they should be scared.
“Are you scared? I’m scared. You should be scared.”
They hear that they bosses are compiling ratings on their abilities and that they are also keeping track of all their transgressions large or small. It sounds very much like an atmosphere where goodwill is no where evident. Where the future makeup of the new company has already been decided. Instead of noting an employees positives, their negatives are gathered to support their conclusion for termination. Maybe the new CEO could take some time out and briefly visit with his new employees. Few have actually met this person. Is he afraid to look into the eyes of the mother of two or the employee of 40 years knowing that their future hardship will emanate from his decisions?
Over the weekend, 5,000 employees from PeopleSoft were let go. From news accounts, it sounded like they were well informed of Oracle’s decision to make cuts. Here, any rumors are treated as dirty family secrets and swept under the rug. Are they using certain employees to bridge the gap until their vision of the new company is realized? Do they have any actual plan at all?
I quit, partly because I see a dark period in the near future. Not only would I resent a company that will let so many go in favor of feeding a leadership so inept, but I would also loathe working with a new cast of characters that would surely exhibit the type of audaciously self-serving type of personality that I so dislike.
Amidst corporate doublespeak I’ve struggled with a crisis of conscience. Can I survive and succeed in the rough and tumble business world of (empty) suits? Do I even want to?
It started with the simple public schmoozing of a newly hired supervisor to a company executive. Maybe you had to be there. Maybe the fact that this executive was blowing smoke up our ass to which nobody dared to respond. It was out of this atmosphere that the newbie chose to so finely illustrate the new company; the back-stabbing, ass-kissing, selfish prick.
This seemingly harmless and obscure scene has stay with me since. So much so, that I sat down with my manager and discussed, off the record, my coworkers’ banter with the executive. I remember saying, “Do I need to kiss ass to get ahead in the real world? Is it wise to expect that a boss in my future will respond to my honest and frank speak?”
From Day One, we have been fed a continuous stream of lies. First, that we all had a job at the new company on the condition that we worked harder. What we have since found is that our buyers strive to create cookie cutter banks--that is--place the same formula over every institution that is sucked into its orbit. We also found from other companies acquired by our buyers have an alarmingly high turnover rate. How does that happen? For one, the oldest trick in politics; frame the question before your opponent does and then answer it for them negatively.
They tell us to work harder and strive to achieve higher goals all the while, the create a false stigma that the employees are old, unmotivated, uneducated, lazy, complacent and surf the internet all day. The stereotype is pervasive and is the reason why no current employee of the “old regime” will ever seriously have any chance at all of the supposed great opportunities the bank has to offer.
In hiring, there is a concerted effort to offer positions only to college graduates whether or not they have any real experience on the job. As my manager postulates, the former owners chose to hire from within to save money subsequently left the company with a deficit of education within its ranks
Never mind that the former owners were a thrifty bunch, but they also faithfully treated their employees with respect. The treachery towards some of the executives from the old company is appalling.
When the former owners signed their checks they described them longingly as an anachronism in the fast-paced world of banking. Like a old, quaint building still standing amongst much larger and sleek skyscrapers. When they left, the company line was to tarnish everything that was created. Why didn’t they grow this bank? To listen some executives nowadays you would think that the former owners left the bank vault open and the keys under the mat.
When I came on board in 2000, I was skeptical about the former owners. Were they really so down-to-earth? Here was this scruffy guy in a faded leather bomber jacket eating miniature powder donuts in the lunchroom. He was truly the accidental banker. It wasn’t until his farewell dinner did I come to understand him and why the bank operated in such an old-style business manner.
He sat at the head table and completely fawned over his daughter who was sitting next to him. To this day, I have rarely seen so much apparent love for their offspring than I witnessed that night.
It is for this reason and solely this, that I react so angrily to the new description of my fellow coworkers. The executive from down south that I earlier mentioned dares to wonder, out loud, how we could never want to advance in our jobs and strive to achieve greater success and responsibility. He says, “Doesn’t it make you feel good to do a good job?” My response: I do not believe that this executive has any children of his own and if he does he should spend a little more time with them. What he reads as complacency other see as an honorable choice to allow stability to child rearing.
Employees didn’t go home to their children stressed out. Quitting time was 4:15, which allowed plenty of time to pickup their children from daycare. The people that I work with are hardworking, honorable people who have simply made the choice to give more of themselves to their families than to spreadsheets and mortgage loans. Instead of trashing our lifestyles, look at your own hollow existence.
It was in this atmosphere that I took it upon myself to ask for more work. I specifically requested an expansion of my duties on six occasion starting last May. I was given small, sometimes dubious work and completed it quickly and wallowed until I ask for more. My intention was merely to keep my mind active and not solely to gain notoriety, although, I expected it to come hand in hand.
Last month, I was given an assignment along with another person to create from existing sources a specific company procedure. I was given this assignment directly from my manager’s boss.
Once a draft of the procedure was created, it was effectively stolen from me by my boss. He conjured up a “corrected” copy of my draft in the form of a Word file. Instead of correcting the errors, he sought to visually inflate the number of errors by using the strikethrough function along with the correction in red. This apparent show of work on his part was undermined by the fact that nearly all of them came from existing procedures that surely was copy edited by our affiliated company down south.
Afterwards, I was completely shutout of any meeting pertaining to this project, in fact, my newly-hired supervisor, less than a week on the job, was jettisoned to one of these meetings instead of me. I obtained a copy of my manager’s creation and found it nearly identical to my draft.
When I confronted him on any of these facts he sheepishly ran from me without any answers to my queries. Why would he knowingly steal my work for his own? Many have told me that this happens all the time, “That’s what bosses do.” True, but in this instance, the assignment was given directly to me and my coworker not to him and no credit was due to him.
This is a selfish, conniving and morally bankrupt person. With the presupposition that to survive at this new bank, we needed to work harder; this manager has sought to undercut my ability to succeed for his own hide. He would rather reach his much sought after retirement age on the backs of people barely surviving on wages over the poverty line than by his own merits.
My disdain for his business acumen is pervasive throughout the company. Although, an acknowledgment of some sort of guile on his part should be recognized. His complete lack of any banking knowledge or leadership has defied logic for a long time. He cannot competently perform the duties of any of his subordinates. Has squandered three opportunities to learn the companies computer system in three years. He once famously mentioning that he didn’t need to learn it.
He pays lip-service to customer service when in fact speaking to a customer amounts to the pulling of one’s teeth. He shows very little empathy towards his employees to the point where he has made comments amounting to dismay that someone would need so many days to grieve or go so far as to rush an employee off the phone when she simply called him with an update of the status of her ailing spouse.
He also displays a shocking inability to make the simplest decisions. One notorious story included asking the former CFO how to solve an argument over a new leather jacket that was supposedly commingling with another's jacket in a closet. He favors leaning on his more knowledgeable employees to such a degree that they readily feel burned out or leave the company all together.
I apologize for this analogy, but he fits the basic plot of the children’s cartoon, “Inspector Gadget”. The bumbling, robotic super agent despite his buffoonery, always solves the crime not by his own good work but unknowingly by his young niece and her dog. My manager is Inspector Gadget and his underlings are the niece and dog. His boss can cite his ability to keep delinquencies low during staff meetings, but it clearly incites animosity and anger to the highest level. It further creates a divide between the higher ups and the regular employees.
When will executives at this company realize that the teamwork that they urge and describe to their workers comes across as deeply hollow. This type of camaraderie will only occur if the workers truly trust their bosses. When they have that sense; only then will this type of teamwork begin to coalesce. I attended a staff meeting two weeks ago where the same stock rhetoric of teamwork was pushed again. If this was a football team’s locker room an outside observer would surely conclude that the coach had lost the hearts and minds of the team. There was disinterest, anger and virtual daggers being shot towards her. Might this hostile attitude be warranted? Of course.
They hear an executive continually tell them they should be scared.
“Are you scared? I’m scared. You should be scared.”
They hear that they bosses are compiling ratings on their abilities and that they are also keeping track of all their transgressions large or small. It sounds very much like an atmosphere where goodwill is no where evident. Where the future makeup of the new company has already been decided. Instead of noting an employees positives, their negatives are gathered to support their conclusion for termination. Maybe the new CEO could take some time out and briefly visit with his new employees. Few have actually met this person. Is he afraid to look into the eyes of the mother of two or the employee of 40 years knowing that their future hardship will emanate from his decisions?
Over the weekend, 5,000 employees from PeopleSoft were let go. From news accounts, it sounded like they were well informed of Oracle’s decision to make cuts. Here, any rumors are treated as dirty family secrets and swept under the rug. Are they using certain employees to bridge the gap until their vision of the new company is realized? Do they have any actual plan at all?
I quit, partly because I see a dark period in the near future. Not only would I resent a company that will let so many go in favor of feeding a leadership so inept, but I would also loathe working with a new cast of characters that would surely exhibit the type of audaciously self-serving type of personality that I so dislike.
Thanks For The Memories
My last day of work was more emotion than I thought. Many different feelings were swirling inside of me. On the surface, I knew that I was going to miss many of the people that I’ve worked with for the last four years. I’m going to miss my friend, Hugo and our insanely sophomoric lunchroom banter. The famous “Would Ya!” game will probably meet a slow death, too.
I’m going to miss my friend, Ray and his good humor with me. Not to mention, his amazing ability to break out in broadway tunes at any moment. I’m going to miss Danielle and her wry sense of humor and besides, I always knew that she would laugh at anything I would say. I thank her for that.
I’m going to miss by “brotha”, Nato from downstairs. He is, without a doubt, one of the most kindest person that I have ever met. I look forward to his kindness in the future when he invites me over for one of his amazing barbeques. Plus, he always says my mom is a “babe”.
I’m going to miss my buddy Alan and his simple but dead-on impressions of everyone in our department. Count them: “Oh, Oh, Oh, this dude...”, “Hey man! D-D-D-D-D”, “Okaaaayyy.....”, “I zont zink zo” and “Hey now...”. I wish him good luck.
Aside from saying goodbye to so many good people, leaving the bank effectively ended a tumulteous time in my life. It was at this building that I spent the last meaningful moments with my sister.
Suzie started working as a teller at the bank in October of 2001. We rode BART together every morning and frequently met for lunch. I remember being so proud that my little sister was working in the same building as I and so happy to see me two nephews visit the bank on Christmas Eve. They still remember it and continued to visit after her death.
When she died I feared a time in the future when I would move into a new life that had no connection to her whatsoever. The fear was that I would be losing a part of her. I think my decision to leave the bank and attend school will effectively end one living reminder of her. I realize it must happen sooner than later but it still saddened me.
One memory that will stick with me forever is this: On what would be the end her last day of work, I waited for her in the lobby of the bank as I typically did. We walked down the steps on Market Street that lead to the BART station underground as usual. She did something different this time. Just as we took the first step downwards, she held my hand. We were very close siblings, but grabbing my held was out of the ordinary. We walked down the stairs holding hands and have always wondered whether she sensed her demise and was thanking me.
On Friday night, I walked down the same stairs to the BART station looking towards a new life.
I’m going to miss my friend, Ray and his good humor with me. Not to mention, his amazing ability to break out in broadway tunes at any moment. I’m going to miss Danielle and her wry sense of humor and besides, I always knew that she would laugh at anything I would say. I thank her for that.
I’m going to miss by “brotha”, Nato from downstairs. He is, without a doubt, one of the most kindest person that I have ever met. I look forward to his kindness in the future when he invites me over for one of his amazing barbeques. Plus, he always says my mom is a “babe”.
I’m going to miss my buddy Alan and his simple but dead-on impressions of everyone in our department. Count them: “Oh, Oh, Oh, this dude...”, “Hey man! D-D-D-D-D”, “Okaaaayyy.....”, “I zont zink zo” and “Hey now...”. I wish him good luck.
Aside from saying goodbye to so many good people, leaving the bank effectively ended a tumulteous time in my life. It was at this building that I spent the last meaningful moments with my sister.
Suzie started working as a teller at the bank in October of 2001. We rode BART together every morning and frequently met for lunch. I remember being so proud that my little sister was working in the same building as I and so happy to see me two nephews visit the bank on Christmas Eve. They still remember it and continued to visit after her death.
When she died I feared a time in the future when I would move into a new life that had no connection to her whatsoever. The fear was that I would be losing a part of her. I think my decision to leave the bank and attend school will effectively end one living reminder of her. I realize it must happen sooner than later but it still saddened me.
One memory that will stick with me forever is this: On what would be the end her last day of work, I waited for her in the lobby of the bank as I typically did. We walked down the steps on Market Street that lead to the BART station underground as usual. She did something different this time. Just as we took the first step downwards, she held my hand. We were very close siblings, but grabbing my held was out of the ordinary. We walked down the stairs holding hands and have always wondered whether she sensed her demise and was thanking me.
On Friday night, I walked down the same stairs to the BART station looking towards a new life.
Man Fired For Online Comments
A Scottish man in Edinburgh was fired by his employer for comments made on his online blog. Joe Gordon, a bookseller, was sacked for referring to his manager as the "Evil Boss". (news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/4167629.stm)
Man, good thing I never wrote about my manager in this space...until now and after I resigned. I probably could have thought of more scathing remarks than "Evil Boss".
Man, good thing I never wrote about my manager in this space...until now and after I resigned. I probably could have thought of more scathing remarks than "Evil Boss".
Where Is The MLK Of Today?
Since I was young I've always gravitated towards Martin Luther King, Jr. In second grage, I can vividly remember being mesmerized by his "I Have a Dream" speech. His oratory, his stature and his courage never allowed me to feel outside of what I thought then as merely a black struggle for equality, but purely a just cause.
Today, I bristle at any criticism or blatant racism towards this day used to honor his life. Every year I hear the same refrain, "Why should we give this guy a holiday?" or "He only helped ten percent of the population." These comments have been pervasive at dinner tables and living rooms throughout my life. Is the notion of racial harmony anywhere closer than it was in the 1960s?
As I watch a biography of Dr. King's life I'm astonished by the depth of articulate and charismatic black leaders that surrounded the late civil rights leader. Men like Hosea Williams, Jesse Jackson and Andrew Young.
Where are the black leaders of today?
Will a man like Sen. Barack Obama invest all of his political power into Dr. King's struggle or will he apply it towards personal political gain and higher office?
Times are not any better for African-Americans today. They still can't expect their voting rights to be respected. Public policies still overtly turn a blind eye to their poverty and readily add to it.
This should be a problem of great concern for not only African-Americans but for all Americans. Sadly, Martin Luther King's dream of racial harmony is far from being reached without the rise of someone like himself.
Today, I bristle at any criticism or blatant racism towards this day used to honor his life. Every year I hear the same refrain, "Why should we give this guy a holiday?" or "He only helped ten percent of the population." These comments have been pervasive at dinner tables and living rooms throughout my life. Is the notion of racial harmony anywhere closer than it was in the 1960s?
As I watch a biography of Dr. King's life I'm astonished by the depth of articulate and charismatic black leaders that surrounded the late civil rights leader. Men like Hosea Williams, Jesse Jackson and Andrew Young.
Where are the black leaders of today?
Will a man like Sen. Barack Obama invest all of his political power into Dr. King's struggle or will he apply it towards personal political gain and higher office?
Times are not any better for African-Americans today. They still can't expect their voting rights to be respected. Public policies still overtly turn a blind eye to their poverty and readily add to it.
This should be a problem of great concern for not only African-Americans but for all Americans. Sadly, Martin Luther King's dream of racial harmony is far from being reached without the rise of someone like himself.
Sunday, January 16, 2005
Damn That 'Extreme Makeover'!
What a weekend! Friday, I encountered so many bittersweet emotions with my last day of work. Saturday, I was deeply effected by Clint Eastwood’s likely Oscar winner, “Million Dollar Baby” and Sunday spent a nice day playing cards with some of my grandmother’s friends.
But damn that “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition”! I was crying like a baby. The poor guy was accidentally shot and now is a paraplegic. His family's home a had holes in the walls from a contractor who swindled them. They built him not one, but two homes. Bo-hoo!
This show so overtly pounds away at your heart strings that it’s sickening. They couldn’t stop at just giving a deserving family a new home, but no, they had to throw the guy his own wedding, too!
I’m exhausted.
But damn that “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition”! I was crying like a baby. The poor guy was accidentally shot and now is a paraplegic. His family's home a had holes in the walls from a contractor who swindled them. They built him not one, but two homes. Bo-hoo!
This show so overtly pounds away at your heart strings that it’s sickening. They couldn’t stop at just giving a deserving family a new home, but no, they had to throw the guy his own wedding, too!
I’m exhausted.
Saturday, January 15, 2005
Jets, Vikes Upset Top Seeds
Jets over Steelers...I've got to keep dancing with the girl who brung me. My pre-season Super Bowl pick--the Jets--will upset the vaunted Steelers sterling season. Did anyone notice, last week, Jets kicker and local hero, Doug Brien has crossed eyes? Very worrisome for a kicker, eh.
Falcons over Rams...Indoors and on the carpet might help the Rams, but it will also help the great Michael Vick. A national audience will be able to witness the confindent attitude Atlanta possesses with new coach, Jim Mora. My other pre-season Super Bowl pick will advance.
Vikings over Eagles...I was completely surprised by the Vikes last week. Mike Tice's team came out the gate, amidst Randy Moss' antics and played with no worries. Philly as not played a meaningful game in three weeks nor have they played well since Terrell Owens went to down with an injury. Another hollow season is near for the Eagles.
Patroits over Colts...Will the media finally get off the Peyton Manning lovefest? This "honorable" young man is also the same who was sued for sexual harrassment when he was accused of sticking his bare bottom in the face of a female trainer. The Pats' management is using the weather to their advantages by exposing the field to the rain and snow so as to slow the Colts offense. Indy's formula of stockpiling their offense inspite of their defense will be exposed. Pats will host the AFC Championship next week.
Falcons over Rams...Indoors and on the carpet might help the Rams, but it will also help the great Michael Vick. A national audience will be able to witness the confindent attitude Atlanta possesses with new coach, Jim Mora. My other pre-season Super Bowl pick will advance.
Vikings over Eagles...I was completely surprised by the Vikes last week. Mike Tice's team came out the gate, amidst Randy Moss' antics and played with no worries. Philly as not played a meaningful game in three weeks nor have they played well since Terrell Owens went to down with an injury. Another hollow season is near for the Eagles.
Patroits over Colts...Will the media finally get off the Peyton Manning lovefest? This "honorable" young man is also the same who was sued for sexual harrassment when he was accused of sticking his bare bottom in the face of a female trainer. The Pats' management is using the weather to their advantages by exposing the field to the rain and snow so as to slow the Colts offense. Indy's formula of stockpiling their offense inspite of their defense will be exposed. Pats will host the AFC Championship next week.
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
My Resignation Letter
To All:
It is my intention to resign from my position, effective January 14, 2005, to resume my education. I deeply regret the short notice of this resignation. I thank you for your understanding.
During an election, politicians like to use Ronald Reagan's old line, "Are you better off now than you were four years ago?"
My answer would be yes.
When I first started working for California Savings, my life was far less fulfilling and rewarding. My personal view of myself, today, is much more positive to the point that I can safely explore bold moves in my life.
I owe much to Linda Foss at the Montclair branch for steering me to the main office. To John Lehman for being, by far, the best boss I have ever worked under. From him, I will always value the notion that integrity, discipline, loyalty and good humor can, indeed, co-exist in the workplace. I also reserve thanks to Susan Mationg for being a strong and wise hand in convincing some doubters of my ability.
To all my co-workers, I would like to thank you all for your friendship and sincerely wish you good luck in your future endeavors. How can I forget to thank Jerry Armstrong? For nearly two years, Jerry Armstrong has delivered me a donut and the morning's newspaper. You might say he has expanded my depth of knowledge and my waistline.
Thank you,
Steven Tavares
It is my intention to resign from my position, effective January 14, 2005, to resume my education. I deeply regret the short notice of this resignation. I thank you for your understanding.
During an election, politicians like to use Ronald Reagan's old line, "Are you better off now than you were four years ago?"
My answer would be yes.
When I first started working for California Savings, my life was far less fulfilling and rewarding. My personal view of myself, today, is much more positive to the point that I can safely explore bold moves in my life.
I owe much to Linda Foss at the Montclair branch for steering me to the main office. To John Lehman for being, by far, the best boss I have ever worked under. From him, I will always value the notion that integrity, discipline, loyalty and good humor can, indeed, co-exist in the workplace. I also reserve thanks to Susan Mationg for being a strong and wise hand in convincing some doubters of my ability.
To all my co-workers, I would like to thank you all for your friendship and sincerely wish you good luck in your future endeavors. How can I forget to thank Jerry Armstrong? For nearly two years, Jerry Armstrong has delivered me a donut and the morning's newspaper. You might say he has expanded my depth of knowledge and my waistline.
Thank you,
Steven Tavares
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
Bobby To Tie The Knot
Bobby proposed to Key on Christmas morning at her parents house.
They huddled around the tree to open presents while Key opened Bobby's gift. Inside was, what looked like a giant ring paper weight. She got mad and called him nasty name or phrase (this was all captured on tape) and feigned throwing it at him. I'm not sure this intended as joke, by the way. He told her to look again and she pulled out the engagement ring. How beautiful
Her father, who is Jewish, yelled out that it wasn't official until he got on one knee and proposed. And just as soon as she said yes she had the whole wedding immediately planned. It was like this:
Bobby: Will you marry me?
Key: YES!...and the wedding will be December 3, 2005. Steve will be the best man. All the bridesmaid will be wearing pink. And guys, no bow ties. You'll be wearing pink ties. Salmon and chicken will be served along with a special kosher dinner for the Fogelson Hebrew family members.
They huddled around the tree to open presents while Key opened Bobby's gift. Inside was, what looked like a giant ring paper weight. She got mad and called him nasty name or phrase (this was all captured on tape) and feigned throwing it at him. I'm not sure this intended as joke, by the way. He told her to look again and she pulled out the engagement ring. How beautiful
Her father, who is Jewish, yelled out that it wasn't official until he got on one knee and proposed. And just as soon as she said yes she had the whole wedding immediately planned. It was like this:
Bobby: Will you marry me?
Key: YES!...and the wedding will be December 3, 2005. Steve will be the best man. All the bridesmaid will be wearing pink. And guys, no bow ties. You'll be wearing pink ties. Salmon and chicken will be served along with a special kosher dinner for the Fogelson Hebrew family members.
Monday, January 10, 2005
My iTunes Playlist (Jan. 10)
Here's a list of my recent iTunes downloads and what's playing in my CD player:
1 Monkey to Man-Elvis Costello
2 Let's Dance-David Bowie
3 Modern Love-David Bowie
4 Much Too Late for Goodbyes-Julian Lennon
5 Valotte-Julian Lennon
6 Baby, It's Tonight-Jude Cole
7 Come on Eileen-Dexy's Midnight Runners
8 Eye of the Tiger-Survivor
9 Heat Is On-Glenn Frey
10 Dreamtime-Daryl Hall
11 Ghostbusters-Ray Parker, Jr
12 Sea of Love-Honeydrippers
13 Mack the Knife-Bobby Darin
14 Beyond the Sea-Bobby Darin
1 Monkey to Man-Elvis Costello
2 Let's Dance-David Bowie
3 Modern Love-David Bowie
4 Much Too Late for Goodbyes-Julian Lennon
5 Valotte-Julian Lennon
6 Baby, It's Tonight-Jude Cole
7 Come on Eileen-Dexy's Midnight Runners
8 Eye of the Tiger-Survivor
9 Heat Is On-Glenn Frey
10 Dreamtime-Daryl Hall
11 Ghostbusters-Ray Parker, Jr
12 Sea of Love-Honeydrippers
13 Mack the Knife-Bobby Darin
14 Beyond the Sea-Bobby Darin
Friday, January 07, 2005
Rams, Jets Win On Upset Saturday
Rams over Seahawks...Wow! The playoffs open with two undeserving participants. Who deserves it less? Seattle does. The Rams have too much firepower for the 'Hawks. Will this be Mike Holmgren's last game in Sea-town? If so, don't bet on seeing Wilford Brimley with a headset manning the sideline next year in San Fran.
Jets over Chargers... N.Y. completes Saturday's sweep by the visiting team. How many times in sports do you see a franchise like San Diego quickly vault to the top from nowhere only to stumble in the playoffs and just as quickly bring its fans and aspirations down to earth. Besides, the Jets are my pre-season Super Bowl champs.
Packers over Vikings...Minny will lose its third game to the Pack and it probably costs head coach, Mike Tice his job. The media loves to turn NFL head coaches into Einstein-like geniuses. In acutality they're nothing more than glorified P.E. teachers. I bring this up because Tice looks like the dopiest-looking coach I've ever seen. As for the game, blah, blah, blah, Brett Favre works his magic, again.
Colts over Broncos...The Battle of the Horsies will be a blowout for Indy. The speedy Colts indoors, at home, and on a speedy track will be too much for Denver. The rat-faced coach of the Broncos, Mike Shanahan will return next season despite another early playoff exit.
Jets over Chargers... N.Y. completes Saturday's sweep by the visiting team. How many times in sports do you see a franchise like San Diego quickly vault to the top from nowhere only to stumble in the playoffs and just as quickly bring its fans and aspirations down to earth. Besides, the Jets are my pre-season Super Bowl champs.
Packers over Vikings...Minny will lose its third game to the Pack and it probably costs head coach, Mike Tice his job. The media loves to turn NFL head coaches into Einstein-like geniuses. In acutality they're nothing more than glorified P.E. teachers. I bring this up because Tice looks like the dopiest-looking coach I've ever seen. As for the game, blah, blah, blah, Brett Favre works his magic, again.
Colts over Broncos...The Battle of the Horsies will be a blowout for Indy. The speedy Colts indoors, at home, and on a speedy track will be too much for Denver. The rat-faced coach of the Broncos, Mike Shanahan will return next season despite another early playoff exit.
Friday, December 17, 2004
SF Chronicle Reports LFR Curse
Did Nancy Gay's article in the San Francisco Chronicle unwittingly stumble upon my Doug Gabriel curse, December 16th?
Referring to Gabriel's lone highlight catch against the Steelers and the subsequent drought that followed:
Curse? Could she be possibly referring to my July 21, 2004 post entitled, "The Curse of the Portugee"? As much as I would love to take credit for ruining his season just as I put Yankees' second baseman, Chuck Knoblauch's career in shambles in 1997, I can't. Gabriel's quotes are somewhat disconcerning and fit the profile of the party animal that I know.
The article, in fact, reveals someone over-his-head as a starting wide receiver in the NFL, especially after the departure of Jerry Rice in October. Said Gabriel, "More plays. Different plays. Different routes. My book is little thicker now. Was he talking about his playbook or his little black book. Was, what I thought, a 3am booty call actually Doug practicing his receiving routes?
Referring to Gabriel's lone highlight catch against the Steelers and the subsequent drought that followed:
"It was his greatest play this season. It also proved to be something of a curse."
Curse? Could she be possibly referring to my July 21, 2004 post entitled, "The Curse of the Portugee"? As much as I would love to take credit for ruining his season just as I put Yankees' second baseman, Chuck Knoblauch's career in shambles in 1997, I can't. Gabriel's quotes are somewhat disconcerning and fit the profile of the party animal that I know.
The article, in fact, reveals someone over-his-head as a starting wide receiver in the NFL, especially after the departure of Jerry Rice in October. Said Gabriel, "More plays. Different plays. Different routes. My book is little thicker now. Was he talking about his playbook or his little black book. Was, what I thought, a 3am booty call actually Doug practicing his receiving routes?
Thursday, December 02, 2004
Leave The Game Barry
Sound the alarms. Our national pastime is near the point of irreparable harm.
We all could deduce that Jason Giambi like Gary Sheffield, Ken Caminiti, Mark McGwire and Jose Canseco used steroids. Anyone could easily analyze the evidence logically. The sudden increase in production, the eventual increase in niggling injuries and the subsequent decrease in production and not to mention having accused steroid vendors as acquaintances.
This leads us to the apocalyptic question for the game. The question, that if answered positively, could only be rivaled in the damage it sustains on the game by the 1919 Black Sox scandal--Did Barry Bonds use steroids in his run-up to breaking the all-time home run record?
Barry Bonds must not be allowed to pass Babe Ruth’s 714 homeruns or break Henry Aaron’s Major League record 755 homers. These are hollowed records in baseball history. A ubiquitous asterisk must not be placed in the record books.
In practical terms, what can be done? Really, nothing. Bonds has neither admitted nor been formally accused of using illegal performance-enhancing drugs. All the circumstantial evidence points to him, though. It’s highly unlikely that Commissioner Bud Selig will intervene on the matter. He’s been complicit to the entire reworking of Bonds’ public persona during his run to 755. He’s chosen to ignore any steroid issue when it pertains to Bonds and will continue, at least, until the courts intervene.
A federal judge in San Francisco is contemplating holding evidentiary hearings on the four defendants involved in the BALCO case in January. This may be the arena where evidence of steroids use on Bonds’ behalf become known.
Could we imagine a scenario in the coming weeks where Bonds hangs up his cleats and settles for third on the all-time homers list? There are many convenient excuses that one could conjure. He’ s burned out. He’s old (he has already begun to use this line last season), maybe the fun isn’t in the game since his father died last year or the old “I want to spend more time with family” schtick.
Leave his records as they are now as long as he leaves the game today. It is about time that Barry Bonds is revealed as the most morally corrupt athlete of our time. Given that he is already vilified by nearly everyone but Giants’ fans, he has nevertheless been able to duck the criticism that he truly deserves.
He was already one of the game’s greatest power hitters. He needed more? He needed to obliterate all the game’s most famous marks and do it fraudulently? He’s nothing more than a greedy, petulant, egomaniacal Giant.
We all could deduce that Jason Giambi like Gary Sheffield, Ken Caminiti, Mark McGwire and Jose Canseco used steroids. Anyone could easily analyze the evidence logically. The sudden increase in production, the eventual increase in niggling injuries and the subsequent decrease in production and not to mention having accused steroid vendors as acquaintances.
This leads us to the apocalyptic question for the game. The question, that if answered positively, could only be rivaled in the damage it sustains on the game by the 1919 Black Sox scandal--Did Barry Bonds use steroids in his run-up to breaking the all-time home run record?
Barry Bonds must not be allowed to pass Babe Ruth’s 714 homeruns or break Henry Aaron’s Major League record 755 homers. These are hollowed records in baseball history. A ubiquitous asterisk must not be placed in the record books.
In practical terms, what can be done? Really, nothing. Bonds has neither admitted nor been formally accused of using illegal performance-enhancing drugs. All the circumstantial evidence points to him, though. It’s highly unlikely that Commissioner Bud Selig will intervene on the matter. He’s been complicit to the entire reworking of Bonds’ public persona during his run to 755. He’s chosen to ignore any steroid issue when it pertains to Bonds and will continue, at least, until the courts intervene.
A federal judge in San Francisco is contemplating holding evidentiary hearings on the four defendants involved in the BALCO case in January. This may be the arena where evidence of steroids use on Bonds’ behalf become known.
Could we imagine a scenario in the coming weeks where Bonds hangs up his cleats and settles for third on the all-time homers list? There are many convenient excuses that one could conjure. He’ s burned out. He’s old (he has already begun to use this line last season), maybe the fun isn’t in the game since his father died last year or the old “I want to spend more time with family” schtick.
Leave his records as they are now as long as he leaves the game today. It is about time that Barry Bonds is revealed as the most morally corrupt athlete of our time. Given that he is already vilified by nearly everyone but Giants’ fans, he has nevertheless been able to duck the criticism that he truly deserves.
He was already one of the game’s greatest power hitters. He needed more? He needed to obliterate all the game’s most famous marks and do it fraudulently? He’s nothing more than a greedy, petulant, egomaniacal Giant.
Be Wary of Jason Kendall
The A's traded spare parts in pitchers, Mark Redman and Arthur Rhodes to acquire the Pirates rugged-faced catcher, Jason Kendall, last week.
My complaint with some of Billy Beane's acquisitions is that he never seems to acquire what I refer to as "Men". Players who play the game aggressively, get their uniform dirty and create a fiery atmosphere on the diamond. Boston has a load of these players. Guys like Trot Nixon, Jason Varitek and Kevin Millar and look what happened to the BoSox.
It isn't always about finances because none of these players mentioned command large salaries or are really all-stars caliber performers. Beane definitely added a large dose of grit to the 2005 A's with this deal.
Last season, Beane brought in some "Men" to the A's roster. Mark Kotsay and Damian Miller. Alas, the year that "Men" populated the roster was also the year the A's failed to make the playoffs for the first time in five years. What do I know.
Our friends at AthleticsNation.com are falling over the idea of Kendall in green and gold, I think we should be wary of this type of praise for a guy who is never mentioned as one of the game's best catchers.
Regardless of what others think, you can pencil Kendall at the top of the order followed by Mark Kotsay. Kotsay has indicated that he feels more comfortable batting second.
It is true that Kendall will get himself on base at a high rate, while he isn't the most accomplished baserunner since hurting his ankle in 1999, he isn't required to tear up the basepaths in Oakland's inexact philosophy of station-to-station baseball.
Kendall's positives:
>>Good, spray-hitting contact hitter
>>High OBP
>>Hits consistently against LHP/RHP, Home/Away and 1st/2nd half of the season.
>>Strikes out infrequently
>>Overall, he should improve playing on a winner.
>>He's a "Man"
Kendall's negatives:
>>Average signal-caller
>>Average defensively
>>Catching duties beginning to erode once stellar basespeed
>>Trades power for contact
>>Might make a cute couple with Barry Zito
Many are focusing on the added offense that Kendall might bring to the A's, but last season's squad had few problems scoring runs and actually hit for the highest team average in Oakland history. Kendall average defensive abilities might be problematic over a long season.
I was never a huge fan of Ramon Hernandez. I saw him as the epitome of the feeble-minded A's that squandered playoff chances four straight years. You need your best baseball mind behind the plate. The catcher controls the game. Will Kendall, like Hernandez, be throwing outrageously wild throws to second at the most inopportune time or will his mental breakdowns be more subtle like that of the outgoing catcher, Damian Miller.
As for calling pitches, Kendall worries me again. Many faulted the decline of the A's pitching on pitching coach, Curt Young. The pitchers were very familiar with Young since he was a roving minor league instructor for the A's. They didn't know Damian Miller.
Overall, the key to maximizing Kendall might lie in whether Kotsay can replicate his stellar 2004 season. Both are similar players and should compliment each other at the top of the order. My gut says that Kotsay had a career year at the plate, but his near-Gold Glove worthy patrol of centerfied will still benefit the A's.
Let's not get too excited about Kendall. We need more heft in the middle of the order. Besides, he's been under the radar to many fans, so many have a limited knowledge of him. He's also been on the trading block in Pittsburgh for over two years. Lastly, Beane acquired him for two chumps and a six-pack of Molson.
I will cringe if someone coins the nickname, "J-Ken".
My complaint with some of Billy Beane's acquisitions is that he never seems to acquire what I refer to as "Men". Players who play the game aggressively, get their uniform dirty and create a fiery atmosphere on the diamond. Boston has a load of these players. Guys like Trot Nixon, Jason Varitek and Kevin Millar and look what happened to the BoSox.
It isn't always about finances because none of these players mentioned command large salaries or are really all-stars caliber performers. Beane definitely added a large dose of grit to the 2005 A's with this deal.
Last season, Beane brought in some "Men" to the A's roster. Mark Kotsay and Damian Miller. Alas, the year that "Men" populated the roster was also the year the A's failed to make the playoffs for the first time in five years. What do I know.
Our friends at AthleticsNation.com are falling over the idea of Kendall in green and gold, I think we should be wary of this type of praise for a guy who is never mentioned as one of the game's best catchers.
Regardless of what others think, you can pencil Kendall at the top of the order followed by Mark Kotsay. Kotsay has indicated that he feels more comfortable batting second.
It is true that Kendall will get himself on base at a high rate, while he isn't the most accomplished baserunner since hurting his ankle in 1999, he isn't required to tear up the basepaths in Oakland's inexact philosophy of station-to-station baseball.
Kendall's positives:
>>Good, spray-hitting contact hitter
>>High OBP
>>Hits consistently against LHP/RHP, Home/Away and 1st/2nd half of the season.
>>Strikes out infrequently
>>Overall, he should improve playing on a winner.
>>He's a "Man"
Kendall's negatives:
>>Average signal-caller
>>Average defensively
>>Catching duties beginning to erode once stellar basespeed
>>Trades power for contact
>>Might make a cute couple with Barry Zito
Many are focusing on the added offense that Kendall might bring to the A's, but last season's squad had few problems scoring runs and actually hit for the highest team average in Oakland history. Kendall average defensive abilities might be problematic over a long season.
I was never a huge fan of Ramon Hernandez. I saw him as the epitome of the feeble-minded A's that squandered playoff chances four straight years. You need your best baseball mind behind the plate. The catcher controls the game. Will Kendall, like Hernandez, be throwing outrageously wild throws to second at the most inopportune time or will his mental breakdowns be more subtle like that of the outgoing catcher, Damian Miller.
As for calling pitches, Kendall worries me again. Many faulted the decline of the A's pitching on pitching coach, Curt Young. The pitchers were very familiar with Young since he was a roving minor league instructor for the A's. They didn't know Damian Miller.
Overall, the key to maximizing Kendall might lie in whether Kotsay can replicate his stellar 2004 season. Both are similar players and should compliment each other at the top of the order. My gut says that Kotsay had a career year at the plate, but his near-Gold Glove worthy patrol of centerfied will still benefit the A's.
Let's not get too excited about Kendall. We need more heft in the middle of the order. Besides, he's been under the radar to many fans, so many have a limited knowledge of him. He's also been on the trading block in Pittsburgh for over two years. Lastly, Beane acquired him for two chumps and a six-pack of Molson.
I will cringe if someone coins the nickname, "J-Ken".
Correction to Torture Story
The fifth bullet posted below, referring to American soldiers snapping pornographic photos of prisoner occurred at the Abu Ghraib prison in Baghdad not Camp X-Ray at Guantanamo Bay.
Also: Tuesday's main editorial in the New York Times Op/Ed section further condemned the U.S. interrogation policies in Cuba, but added that the report mentions the level of complaints dropped from 2003 to 2004. Why? Because starting this year female interrogators began exposing their breast to inmates and distributing pornography to gain information.
My guess is when chicks are flashing battle-hardened prisoners of war who haven't seen a woman in months, if not, years; you might gain too much information. I'm willing to bet drawings of Princess Jasmine from the movie Alladin would reveal the location of Osama in a second to these guys.
Joining al-Qaeda suddenly became very American.
Also: Tuesday's main editorial in the New York Times Op/Ed section further condemned the U.S. interrogation policies in Cuba, but added that the report mentions the level of complaints dropped from 2003 to 2004. Why? Because starting this year female interrogators began exposing their breast to inmates and distributing pornography to gain information.
My guess is when chicks are flashing battle-hardened prisoners of war who haven't seen a woman in months, if not, years; you might gain too much information. I'm willing to bet drawings of Princess Jasmine from the movie Alladin would reveal the location of Osama in a second to these guys.
Joining al-Qaeda suddenly became very American.
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