Friday, October 29, 2004

Osama bin Laden Endorses Nader

In a new tape from Osama bin Laden, the leader of the al-qaeda terrorist organization endorsed Ralph Nader for President.

The Saudi born mastermind of the 9/11 said, “Your security is not in the hands of Kerry or Bush or al-Qaida. Your security is in Mr. Ralph Nader.”

This came as no surprise to many political analysts since Nader, being of Lebanese descent, was the only candidate of any Middle Eastern ancestry.

Later in the taped video, bin Laden inexplicably voiced displeasure with the Red Sox first World Series victory in 86 years.

“Fuck, man! I had twenty on St. Louis!”, he continued, “Edmonds and Rolen went 1-for-30 in the series, man! May their first-born male suckle the hairy tit of Ronald McDonald, my friend."

Homeland Security Chief, Tom Ridge announced no intention of raising the color-coded terrorist alert to orange in the cities of Boston or St. Louis.

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