Sunday, November 14, 2004

Lunatic Of The Week-Michael Phelps

He's All Ears
Originally uploaded by wonderbread74.
[Ed. Note: I began writing about this week's Lunatic of the Week before the news of Indiana Pacers' forward Ron Artest. A few days ago Artest announced he needed a few days off from basketball because he was exhausted from recording a rap album. No doubt he would have received the prestigious Golden Straight Jacket instead of Ears McGee over here.]

You might remember U.S. Olympian, Michael Phelps, when he was the wholesome teenager winning seven gold medals at the Athens Games.

The 19 year old, big-earred, swimmer was arrested Nov. 4 for drunken-driving and he's sorry about.

That is, his sponsors that pay him millions of dollars, are sorry; actually scared stiff that their investment in this golden boy may sink.

The point isn't that he was driving drunk or even that he was drinking heavily while underaged, but don't parade yourself around for a halftime show at a NFL game and then huddle around some kids a few days later to regret your indiscretion.

Just a few days after the arrest, Phelps appeared at halftime of a Baltimore Ravens game. Boy, did he look like he was having a blast decked out in the same jersey that fellow criminals, Ray Lewis and Jamal Lewis, also wear.

Apparently, his sponsors, namely Visa, PowerBar and Speedo scrambled for some way to protect their investment. Bring in the kids!

Phelps showed up at a local Boys & Girls Club in to tell the 10-year old kids that they shouldn't drink and drive.

Said Phelps: "Going up there and talking about the mistake, it was definitely one of the hardest things I've ever done. ... It was extremely hard to stand in front of kids who I let down, who looked up to me."

17-year old Kerri Taylor said "You could feel his emotion and his sincerity. It wasn't just a front. ... You could see that he regretted it so much."

Yeah, I bet he does. Especially when the credit card and ass floss-like aquatic apparel companies ditch him for another Dumbo-looking albatross.


Anonymous said...

Someone needs to explain to him that he needs to get the GIRLS drunk so THEY are wearing "beer goggles". Poor Earsy...

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